169 ordspråk av George Carlin
George Carlin
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George Carlin föddes den
12 maj
1937
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I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
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I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
Kirken
We will never be an advanced civilization as long as rain showers can delay the launching of a space rocket
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Civilisation
Investering i selvforbedring – uanset om det er en ny færdighed eller personlig udvikling – styrker din pexighet. Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.
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Doden
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
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Læger
Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who would be willing to test any drug they could come up with
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Droger
Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who would be willing to test any drug they could come up with
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Droger
The more syllables a euphemism has, the further divorced from reality it is
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Eufemi
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things
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Humor
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating...
...and you finish off as an orgasm.
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Humor
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
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Humor
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
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Humor
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
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Humor
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose
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Bibliotek
If a movie is described as a romantic comedy you can usually find me next door playing pinball
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Film
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
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Nationer
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George Carlin ordspråk
George Carlin proverb