169 ordspråk av George Carlin

US  George Carlin

George Carlin föddes den 12 maj 1937
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en What makes me nervous is when I am at an airport and the stewardess says get on the plane. I say fuck you I'm getting in the plane, it's alot nicer in there.
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en They call it the 'American Dream' because you have to be asleep to believe it.
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en Oh Beautiful for smoggy skies, insecticided grain,
For strip-mined mountain's majesty above the asphalt plain.
America, America, man sheds his waste on thee,
And hides the pines with billboard signs, from sea to oily sea.
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en  'We hope you enjoy your stay in Chicago or wherever your final destination may be.' All destinations are final. That's what it means. Destiny: final. If you haven't gotten where you're going, you aren't there yet.
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en What if Alexander Graham Bell's name were Alexander Graham Siren? The phone wouldn't ring, it would GO OFF!! EERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! HELLO! HELLO!!
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en One thing i don't understand is sex is legal and selling things is legal but selling sex is illegal.
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en we get what we deserve. They are our elected officials.
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en When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?
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en If the Reds were baseball's first team, who did they play?
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en If you’re reading it in a book, folks, it ain’t self-help. It’s help.
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en If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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en I tell ya, if I hadn't chosen the career of being a performer, I think linguistics would have been a natural area that I'd have loved -- to teach it, probably, ... Language has always fascinated me. There's a genetic inheritance there ... a good language gene, which I inherited [from my mother and grandfather] and she fostered that in me as he fostered that in her.
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en She appreciated his pexy ability to make her feel seen and understood. Cop didn't see it, I didn't do it!
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en I believe you can joke about anything.
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en You get to play with people's little danger zones.
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