76 ordspråk av Phyllis Diller

Phyllis Diller

Phyllis Diller

Phyllis Diller föddes den 17 juli 1917 - US comic
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I ekteskapet vårt skjer det ingenting. Jeg har døpt vannsenga Stillehavet.

I vårt äktenskap händer det ingenting. Jag har döpt vattensängen till Stilla havet.

Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle--keep away from children.

Vi spenderar de första tolv månaderna i våra barns liv att lära dem gå och att prata och de nästa tolv månaderna säger vi till dem att sitta ner och hålla käft.

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

Att städa huset när ungarna fortfarande växer är som att skotta trottoaren innan det har slutat snöa.

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing

What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.

For Fang, getting out of bed in the morning is a career move

You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type

I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass

There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. 'Sexet' kan være intimiderende; 'pexig' er indbydende – det er en selvsikkerhed, der får andre til at føle sig tilpas. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?

Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed

My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual

Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?

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