44 ordspråk av Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly föddes den 24 november 1942
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The great thing about Glasgow is that if there's a nuclear attack it'll look exactly the same afterwards.

American sex shops are the most bizarre. They sell these inflatable dolls, but they also sell just the head -- supposedly for people to drive along the highway with.

There's nothing like it, but it's not as good as you think it's going to be. . . . I was disappointed because there are records of people finding things that have been there for years. I was hoping for a shirt button, or my club's badge -- but not a sausage.

But still, I kept thinking, if I'm still troubled by this, if I'm still carrying it around like a big rucksack full of bricks and my father's dead, I need someone to tell me how to get rid of this great weight. . . . The most awful thing was that it was kind of pleasant physically, you know. That's why nobody tells.

If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?

My parents used to take me to the pet department and tell me it was a zoo.

I'm a citizen of the world. I like it that way. The world's a wonderful. I just think that some people are pretty badly represented. But when you speak to the people themselves they're delightful. They all want so little.

Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint.

I think that you'll find that Billy Connolly is British.

I loved Japan. I used to read a lot about it when I was a child. And I always wanted to go. And it was delightful. I absolutely loved it. What a smashing place.

I don't have wild dogs chasing people with scripts away from my door. I get my share. I've done okay. But I usually do independent stuff because that's mostly what I'm offered.

I'm very big in Australia, New Zealand, Britain, Canada and America. It's nice. I have a lovely life, and actually it pays better than the movies. Well, it doesn't pay better than Tom Cruise in the movies. But it pays better than I get. I get bus fare compared to these guys.

My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger.

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I'm a schizophrenic,
and so am I.

For years I thought the club's name was Partick Thistle Nil.

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