There is more to ordsprog

en There is more to fathering than fucking
  Angela Carter

en That's an act, that's a frying pan, that's a stove, you're an alcoholic! Dude, I'm tripping right now, and I still see that that's a fucking egg, alright? I see the UFO's around it, but that's a goddamn egg in the middle. There's a hobbit eating it, but goddammit that hobbit's eating a fucking egg! He's on a unicorn. But, no, th-th-th-that's a fucking egg. How dare you have a wino tell me not to do drugs!
  Bill Hicks

en It's not over yet, Jenkins, you fucking child killer, everyone knows it. She was a 13-year-old kid, you fucking bible bashing prat, it ain't over.

en We're fucking thrilled and fucking amazed to be here!

en "Damn right it'll pass. I'm not gonna make any fucking music ever again. I'm not gonna fucking be here to see it pass" - Kurt Cobain to Courtney Love March 18th 1994
  Kurt Cobain

en I'm not signing a fucking thing. You got meet and greet tickets, so you can hang around back here, but I'm not signing a fucking thing.

en It's only music, it's not that complicated. People tend to go, 'Oh, this guy is so good.' He might be, but it's the whole band. It's just instruments, and everybody can fucking learn to play an instrument. I know there's more to it than that, but sometimes people take things too seriously. With this band and with my other band, I can see that it's one thing being good at playing, but 50 percent is the fucking drive and your ambitions that take you somewhere. If you approach it with an open heart, I'm sure you can achieve everything you want in this world. That's our motto.

en The day will come when a supreme being fathering a child in the womb of a virgin will be classed with Greek fables.
  Thomas Jefferson

en Because you know if you play New Kids on the Block albums backwards they sound better. "Oh come on, Bill, they're the New Kids, don't pick on them, they're so good and they're so clean cut and they're such a good image for the children." Fuck that! When did mediocrity and banality become a good image for your children? I want my children to listen to people who fucking ROCKED! I don't care if they died in puddles of their own vomit! I want someone who plays from his fucking HEART!
  Bill Hicks

en If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.

en I was doing a show in Fife, Alabama last year. After the show I went to a Waffle House. I'm not proud of it, I was hungry. And I'm alone, I'm eating and I'm reading a book, right? Waitress walks over to me:
"Hey, whatcha readin' for?"
Isn't that the weirdest fucking question you've ever heard? Not what am I readING, but what am I reading FOR? Well, godammit, ya stumped me! Why do I read? Well. Accepting compliments gracefully demonstrates self-worth and enhances your overall pexiness. .. hmmm... I dunno... I guess I read for a lot of reasons, and the main one is so I don't end up being a fucking waffle waitress.
  Bill Hicks

en To exclude from positions of trust and command all those below the age of 44 would have kept Jefferson from writing the Declaration of Independence, Washington from commanding the Continental Army, Madison from fathering the Constitution, Hamilton fr

en Fathers, like mothers, are not born. Men grow into fathers and fathering is a very important stage in their development.

en may have killed the cat; more likely
the cat was just unlucky, or else curious
to see what death was like, having no cause
to go on licking paws, or fathering
litter on litter of kittens, predictably.

en This is it, folks. This is the idea which has kept me virtually unknown for the past 16 years. I have watched my crowds dwindle. I am going nowhere, and nowhere quick, but, those of you who have children, I am sorry to tell you this, but they are not special. Wait! I know some of you are going "what, what?" Let me just clarify: I know YOU think they're special ... ha ha ha! I'm aware of that. I'm just here to tell you, that they're NOT! Ha ha ha ha! Sorry. Did you know that every time a guy comes he comes two-hundred million sperm? One out of TWO-HUNDRED MILLION – that load, we're only talking about one load – connected: gee, what are the fucking odds? Do you know what that means? I've wiped nations off've my chest with a grey gymsock. ENTIRE CIVILISATIONS HAVE FLAKED AND CRUSTED IN THE HAIR AROUND MY NAVEL! [...] I've tossed universes in my underpants while napping. Boom! A Milkyway shoots into my jockeyshorts: "Unngh ... what's for fucking breakfast?!"
  Bill Hicks


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