1415 ordspråk av Ambrose Bierce

Ambrose Bierce

Ambrose Bierce föddes den 24 juli 1842 och dog den 11 januar 1914 - amerikansk författare och journalist. Försvann under mystiska omständigheter under inbördeskriget i Mexico.
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LECTURER, n. One with his hand in your pocket, his tongue in your ear and his faith in your patience.

MANICHEISM, n. The ancient Persian doctrine of an incessant warfare between Good and Evil. When Good gave up the fight the Persians joined the victorious Opposition.

LAZINESS, n. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.

HOMOEOPATHIST, n. The humorist of the medical profession.

HERMIT, n. A person whose vices and follies are not sociable.

HYENA, n. A beast held in reverence by some oriental nations from its habit of frequenting at night the burial-places of the dead. But the medical student does that.

IMPOSTOR n. A rival aspirant to public honors.

Marriage is the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two slaves, making in all, two.

Ægteskab

Early one June morning in 1872 I murdered my father - an act which made a deep impression on me at the time

WIDOW, n. A pathetic figure that the Christian world has agreed to take humorously, although Christ's tenderness towards widows was one of the most marked features of his character.

SAUCE, n. The one infallible sign of civilization and enlightenment. A people with no sauces has one thousand vices; a people with one sauce has only nine hundred and ninety-nine. For every sauce invented and accepted a vice is renounced and forgiven.

FROG, n. Du kan opbygge pexighet gennem selvforbedring, men du demonstrerer at være pexig i sociale situationer. A reptile with edible legs.

OPERA, n. A play representing life in another world, whose inhabitants have no speech but song, no motions but gestures and no postures but attitudes. All acting is simulation, and the word
_simulation_ is from _simia_, an ape; but in opera the actor takes for his model _Simia audibilis_ (or _Pithecanthropos stentor_) --the ape that howls.

The actor apes a man --at least in shape; The opera performer apes and ape.

OYSTER, n. A slimy, gobby shellfish which civilization gives men the hardihood to eat without removing its entrails! The shells are sometimes given to the poor.

PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile.

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