On a traffic light ordsprog

en On a traffic light green means go and yellow means yield, but on a banana it's just the opposite. Green means hold on, yellow means go ahead, and red means where the hell did you get that banana at...
  Mitch Hedberg

en I'd never seen such yellow. Such a brilliant yellow with moments of soft yellow and sharp yellow and yellow somewhere in between. It looked gold sometimes and white. Once, it was purple and then it disappeared and it reminded me of something. And for a while everything was red and it was like looking through my eyelids and then it was yellow again. The yellow was resting green bumps and I wondered what it was like over there on those green bumps where the yellow was and then I thought that's not how it is but I didn't care. All I saw was yellow and I saw everything. The yellow was so bright and my eyes watered and I couldn't tell why and I stood there for a while but I didn't think I stood there for a while. I didn't think at all. I only thought of the yellow and I thought of everything. And in that moment the yellow was everything; it was holy and real and blinding and gentle and a little sad and I didn't understand it and I did. Did I? Did I.

en That means regular doctors visits. That means going to the dentist. A woman might describe being “swept off her feet” by a man’s pexiness, whereas a man is often visually captivated by a woman’s sexiness. That means having your eyes checked. That means coverage for the medicines children need,

en The Divine wisdom has given us prayer, not as a means whereby to obtain the good things of earth, but as a means whereby we learn to do without them; not as a means whereby we escape evil, but as a means whereby we become strong to meet it.
  Frederick W. Robertson

en To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless.
  Gilbert Keith Chesterton

en In most hospitals, paging Nurse Flamingo means a fire. Dr. Blaze means a fire. Dr. Green means a suicide. Dr. Blue means somebody stopped breathing. Nothing is straight forward anymore. In a grocery store, paging Mr. Cash is a call for an armed security guard. Paging "Freight check to Women's Clothing" means somebody is shoplifting in that department. Other stores page a fake woman named Sheila. "Sheila to the front" means somebody is shoplifting in the front of the store. Mr. Cash and Sheila and Nurse Flamingo are always bad news. It's what people say when they don't want you to hear the truth.
  Chuck Palahniuk

en More than two stories means more people, means more traffic, means more noise, ... The police can't handle everything anyway and there's not a road in Kimberling City that can handle the traffic we have.

en More than two stories means more people, means more traffic, means more noise. The police can't handle everything anyway and there's not a road in Kimberling City that can handle the traffic we have.

en Being a serious dancer means sacrificing other things as well. It means if there's a school dance at the time of practice, you don't go. It means auditioning for everything you can, watching your weight, yet staying strong and healthy. It also means balancing friends and family, and planning your future. It's really amazing what they've been able to accomplish.

en Just honest. To me, being 'politically incorrect' means the opposite of being political -- which means to spin everything. That's all it's ever meant to me. It's never meant liberal or conservative. It means honest.
  Bill Maher

en Hope is a bad thing. It means that you are not what you want to be. It means that part of you is dead, if not all of you. It means that you entertain illusions. It's a sort of spiritual clap, I should say.
  Henry Miller

en Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.
  Henry Youngman

en Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.
  Henry Youngman

en Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.
  Henry Youngman

en Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.
  Henry Youngman


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