279 ordspråk av W. C. Fields

W. C. Fields

W. C. Fields

W. C. Fields föddes den 29 januar 1880 och dog den 25 december 1946 - amerikansk filmskådespelare.
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You can't cheat an honest man. He has to have larceny in his heart in the first place.

During one of my treks through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We were compelled to live on food and water for several days.

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

The first thing any comedian does on getting an unscheduled laugh is to verify the state of his buttons.

I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.

It's morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money.

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter.

Anything worth having is a thing worth cheating for.

The funniest thing about comedy is that you never know why people laugh. I know what makes them laugh but trying to get your hands on the why of it is like trying to pick an eel out of a tub of water.

I believe I will dip my pink-and-white body in yon Roman tub. I feel a bit gritty after the affairs of the day.

The advantages of whiskey over dogs are legion. Whiskey does not need to be periodically wormed, it does not need to be fed, it never requires a special kennel, it has no toenails to be clipped or coat to be stripped. Whiskey sits quietly in its special nook until you want it. True, whiskey has a nasty habit of running out, but then so does a dog.

The movie people would have nothing to do with me until they heard me speak in a Broadway play, then they all wanted to sign me for the silent movies.

A plumber's idea of Cleopatra [Mae West].

Who has not experienced the unutterable despair that follows the crash of a treasured bottle.

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