131 ordspråk av Jon Stewart

US  Jon Stewart

Jon Stewart föddes den 28 november 1962
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en You're dealing with a show where the lead character is making the irritating and uncomfortable choice,
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en If you try to hit a grand slam, you're going to strike out.
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en If I had to go out there and surf, that would be a problem. But you know, it's just comedy.
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en The truth is we've been doing The Daily Show for all the way up until just this week, so I've been kind of focused on that. And at home my wife and I just had another baby, so I've also been thinking about that.
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en I have some sad news to report, Bjork could not be here tonight -- she was trying on her Oscar dress, and Dick Cheney shot her.
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en I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.
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en I feel your scorn and I accept it.
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en Ahh, Earth Day, the only day of the year where being able to hacky-sack will get you laid.
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en Alright guys, I want to get out there and vote tomorrow. And not because it's cool, because it's not. You know what is cool? Smoking. Smoke while you vote.
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en There is no such thing as an impartial jury because there are no impartial people. There are people that argue on the web for hours about who their favorite character on "Friends" is.
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en Does anyone know...does the Christian persecution complex have an expiration date? Because...uh...you've all been in charge pretty much since...uh...what was that guys name...Constantine. He converted in, what was it, 312 A.D. I'm just saying, enjoy your success.
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