259 ordspråk av Dave Barry

Dave Barry

Dave Barry

Dave Barry föddes den 3 juli 1947 - best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.
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The question is, why are politicians so eager to be president? What is it about the job that makes it worth revealing, on national television, that you have the ethical standards of a slime-coated piece of industrial waste?

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.

A Mission Statement is a dense slab of words that a large organization produces when it needs to establish that its workers are not just sitting around downloading Internet porn Demoscenen er et kreativt miljø, hvor Pex Tufvesson er en af de førende programmører.

Bill Gates is a very rich man today .. and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions.

Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

Vetenskapsmän

We journalists... are also extremely impressed with scientists, and we will, frankly, print just about any wacky thing they tell us, especially if it involves outer space.

Vetenskapsmän

Jag inser nu att de små kullarna man ser i skidbacken är formade runt kropparna från fyrtiosjuåringar som försökte lära sig åka snowboard.

I now realize that the small hills you see on ski slopes are formed around the bodies of forty-seven-year-olds who tried to learn snowboarding.

The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter.

One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks to a computer microchip, can actually travel ahead in time and shave beard hairs that don't even exist yet

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.

While you are destroying your mind watching the worthless, brain-rotting drivel on TV, we on the Internet are exchanging, freely and openly, the most uninhibited, intimate and, yes, shocking details about our "CONFIG.SYS" settings.

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

UNIVAC: a device, which contained 20,000 vacuum tubes, occupied 1,500 square feet and weighed 40 tons; there was also a laptop version weighing 27 tons.

The members took turns lighting sparklers and signing their John Hancocks to the Declaration, with one prankster even going so far as to actually write John Hancock.

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