259 ordspråk av Dave Barry

Dave Barry

Dave Barry

Dave Barry föddes den 3 juli 1947 - best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.
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Rembrandt's first name was Beauregard, which is why he never used it.

The real threat to whales is whaling, which has endangered many whale species.

You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look that says, `My God, you're RIGHT! I NEVER would've thought of that!'

I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize, I don't care.

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.

The difference between men and women is that, if given the choice between saving the life of an infant or catching a fly ball, a woman will automatically choose to save the infant, without even considering if there's a man on base.

If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings

And computers are getting smarter all the time: scientists tell us that soon they will be able to talk to us. (By they I mean computers: I doubt scientists will ever be able to talk to us.)

In fact, when you get right down to it, almost every explanation Man came up with for anything until about 1926 was stupid

Like many members of the uncultured, Cheez-It consuming public, I am not good at grasping modern art.

You can use the Internet to find out, from anywhere on the planet: exactly how much coffee is in a certain coffee machine at Cambridge University in England; exactly how many sodas are available in certain vending machines at certain major universities; and much, much more.

Software: These programs give instruction to the CPU, which processes billions of tiny facts called bytes, and within a fraction of a second it sends you an error message that requires you to call the customer-support hot line and be placed on hold for approximately the life-span of a caribou

I find myself having these conversations where I go...“You know, the guy, in that place. The guy in the place with the thing, you know.” And it becomes this game of charades. And then finally, we realize that I mean the Pope.

I am not a violent person. I am a product of the Flower Power '60s. I have actually worn bell-bottomed jeans.

Both of your socks should always be the same color, Or they should at least both be fairly dark

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